Saturday, 15 October 2011

Kokinshu #148

Saturday, 15 October 2011 08:45
lnhammer: the Chinese character for poetry, red on white background (Default)
(Topic unknown.)

    When I remember,
I cry out like the cuckoo
    of Tokiwa Hill,
straining so hard that the throat
is stained bright Chinese crimson.

—28 September 2011

(Original author unknown.) Tokiwa is just outside the western boundary of Heian Kyoto, continuing the progression of settings. A couple pivot-words: the toki part of Tokiwa also means "when" and furi-idete = "infusing" (a dye into water) / "using great effort" (so for a voice, to be loud), plus the final naku is nominally the cuckoo's singing but also by the usual pun the speaker's weeping. While the Chinese crimson sounds in translation like a hyperbolic metaphor, the Japanese word, karakurenai, is onomatopoetic of the cuckoo's song and to cry so hard one's tears are bloody is another trope borrowed from China. All in all, a startling technical tour de force, this one -- and a challenge to translate effectively. What is made red is unstated but required by English syntax -- to highlight the connection between speaker and bird, I chose anatomy in common, but an argument could be made for the culturally appropriate "tears" instead. On the other hand, my "bright" is there only for the soundplay, absent anything like pivot-words in English.


omoi-izuru
tokiwa no yama no
hototogisu
karakurenai no
furi-idete zo naku


---L.

About

Warning: contents contain line-breaks.

As language practice, I like to translate poetry. My current project is Chinese, with practice focused on Tang Dynasty poetry. Previously this was classical Japanese, most recently working through the Kokinshu anthology (archived here). Suggestions, corrections, and questions always welcome.

There's also original pomes in the journal archives.

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