Palace Song, Gu Kuang (Tang Shi #278)

[lnhammer]

In the jade tower halfway to heaven, song and dance begin—
Wind brings the harmonious laughter and chatter of palace concubines.
Shadows depart the Moon Hall; I hear the nighttime water clock;
I roll up the crystal curtain, and draw near the Autumn River.

宫词
玉楼天半起笙歌，
风送宫嫔笑语和。
月殿影开闻夜漏，
水晶帘卷近秋河。

The Moon Hall is the palace of Chang’e, goddess of the moon. The Autumn River is the Milky Way, which becomes prominent in the early night sky in autumn. I like the intricate parallels of mundane and celestial details in this.

(I want fan art for this one.)

—L.

Comments

[sartorias]

I got the sense of kai. I sure wish my brain was able to deal with stuff like semantic parallels, but that seems like math to me. Which definitely has its delights, I know, but it's such a swimming-through-fudge labor for me to get there, for a glimmering I can al-most see.

But images? Oh, what a richness!

[lnhammer]

Well, let's take apart that final couplet. The basic words are:

moon hall | shadows | open/start (moving) || hear | night | water-clock
crystal | curtain | roll up || draw near | autumn | river

Each line is has two phrases: the first, a 2-character descriptor for the subject of a verb; the second, a verb with an implied subject of the speaker with a direct object that's a noun of time modifying a water-related object. Across the two phrases, words in same function are either similar (such as the water-related clock and river) or direct contrasts (such as open and roll up).

Tight, tight writing -- especially there's also a pattern of tones to maintain.

[sartorias]

Mathematically tight.